It's all about jokes, funny pics...

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vmisev said:
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I'm sorry to be obnoxious, and I suspect you are not a native English speaker, but I have to correct you:
The plural of "product" (a thing that is made) is "products". With s a the end.
The plural of "produce" (a thing that is grown, like carrots or apples) is "produce". Without an s at the end. Why? The obvious (and correct) answer is that English is weird, bizarre, and illogical. The formal answer is that "produce" is a noun that is inherently plural, like data: the word means multiple grown things, uncountably many, including one. So one apple is produce, three apples and a pear and a banana are produce, and a fruit salad (you know the stuff that comes in cans from Libby's and looks like it was colored with chemicals, because it was) is also produce.

Since this is the joke thread, and having just been obnoxious in teaching an English lesson, let me add a joke about singular and plural:

How come "bra" is singular, but it covers two things? While "panties" is plural, but it only covers one thing?
 
ralphbsz said:
I'm sorry to be obnoxious, and I suspect you are not a native English speaker, but I have to correct you:
The plural of "product" (a thing that is made) is "products". With s a the end.
The plural of "produce" (a thing that is grown, like carrots or apples) is "produce". Without an s at the end. Why? The obvious (and correct) answer is that English is weird, bizarre, and illogical. The formal answer is that "produce" is a noun that is inherently plural, like data: the word means multiple grown things, uncountably many, including one. So one apple is produce, three apples and a pear and a banana are produce, and a while fruit salad (you know the stuff that comes in cans from Libby's and looks like it was colored with chemicals, because it was) is also produce.

Since this is the joke thread, and having just been obnoxious in teaching an English lesson, let me add a joke about singular and plural:

How come "bra" is singular, but it covers two things? While "panties" is plural, but it only covers one thing?
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Thanks for correction, I wasn't sure, so I checked and one of the first search results was:
"Produces | meaning of Produces"
video by The Definition Channel
with The Definition Channel! Discover clear and concise explanations of English words and phrases. Perfect for learners at all levels
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I'll post video because now I see that they are a joke as well:
 
vmisev said:
What bothers me is what is the right pronunciation of data: IPA [ˈdæɾ.ə] or IPA [ˈdeɪ.ɾə]? I'm hearing both from well educated people? I was thought that only first is correct and that second is always wrong...
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Both "Day-tuh" and "Du-tuh" are actually correct and perfectly understandable, like English pronunciation of "tomato". From time to time you do run into people who get snobby with their limited view of what's 'correct' pronunciation.

Spoken languages are a funny thing. On Youtube, I've seen some clips that explain how changing the audible pronunciation (of a given word in Chinese) changes the very meaning of that word, sometimes in very surprising ways. European languages are a lot more forgiving in that regard.
 
astyle said:
Both "Day-tuh" and "Du-tuh" are actually correct and perfectly understandable, like English pronunciation of "tomato". From time to time you do run into people who get snobby with their limited view of what's 'correct' pronunciation.

Spoken languages are a funny thing. On Youtube, I've seen some clips that explain how changing the audible pronunciation (of a given word in Chinese) changes the very meaning of that word, sometimes in very surprising ways. European languages are a lot more forgiving in that regard.
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Bayerische Motoren Werke 🤣
https://www.tiktok.com/video/7407501725785181486
 
I remember at a Thanksgiving dinner, my niece brought a friend. He asked what I do and I said, I work at a data center. He though I said dating center, and the conversation went on a few minutes, making perfect sense to both of us, until something was said that made him realize I'd said data, not dating. Funnier at the time than it is when I write it, but, Oh well. :)
 
scottro said:
I remember at a Thanksgiving dinner, my niece brought a friend. He asked what I do and I said, I work at a data center. He though I said dating center, and the conversation went on a few minutes, making perfect sense to both of us, until something was said that him realize I'd said data, not dating. Funnier at the time than it is when I write it, but, Oh well. :)
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I had even funnier experience, one that didn't even involve pronunciation, nor another person, just stupid me, barely understanding English at that point – very early '90s, pre www. I stumbled upon matchmaking BBS connected to internet, and I honestly thought "Ah, match-making, that must be something like football manager RPG". Only halfway in the registration process (like 10-15 minutes later) I got suspicious "why it is asking so many personal details about myself", grabbed dictionary from the shelf and 🤦‍♂️and Alt-H 🤣
 
vmisev said:
I had even funnier experience, one that didn't even involve pronunciation, nor another person, just stupid me, barely understanding English at that point – very early '90s, pre www. I stumbled upon matchmaking BBS connected to internet, and I honestly thought "Ah, match-making, that must be something like football manager RPG". Only halfway in the registration process (like 10-15 minutes later) I got suspicious "why it is asking so many personal details about myself", grabbed dictionary from the shelf and 🤦‍♂️and Alt-H 🤣
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I still have a box of unspent matches in my kitchen, BTW 😂
 
ralphbsz said:
The plural of "produce" (a thing that is grown, like carrots or apples) is "produce". Without an s at the end. Why? The obvious (and correct) answer is that English is weird, bizarre, and illogical. The formal answer is that "produce" is a noun that is inherently plural, like data: the word means multiple grown things, uncountably many, including one.
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BTW, we do have similar words in Serbian, so called 'pluralia tantum', like for door/doors -in Serbian single word 'vrata' for both singular and plural; back (as the posterior (rear) section of the body) - Serbian "leđa", again, for both singular and plural. and some are the same as in English: scissor - "makaze", glasses (optical eyewear) - "naočare" (literal: on the eyes), all pluralia tantum, and there are probably more examples...
 
You guys oughta be sent to the punitentiary. :) (For non-native speakers that's a pun on penitentiary).
Some consider puns the lowest form of humor, but they make me laugh. Though I do remember making a pun in Japanese years ago, that I thought clever. A friend said, that's a little kid's joke. I said, Well, I've only been speaking Japanese for 4 years, so it fits.
 
scottro said:
You guys oughta be sent to the punitentiary. :) (For non-native speakers that's a pun on penitentiary).
Some consider puns the lowest form of humor, but they make me laugh. Though I do remember making a pun in Japanese years ago, that I thought clever. A friend said, that's a little kid's joke. I said, Well, I've only been speaking Japanese for 4 years, so it fits.
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It's funny how we must turn sideways to smile in typed text :) but Japanese folks who bow as form of respect, will not do that when smiling ^^
 
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