It's all about jokes, funny pics...

[Maturin]

In a job interview the HR manager asks the candidate about his marital status.
"Not married", answers the candidate.
"Sorry", says the manager, "but we only employ people used to knuckle under."

 

[Maturin]

Jack comes back from vacation.
His boss asks, 'And, how was Brazil?'
'Terrible', Jack replies, 'the one half of all people are soccer players, the other half are prostitutes.'
'My wife is from Brazil!' the boss says.
Jack hesitates, '- ...which team she played?'

 

[Maturin]

Bob comes his first time to play on that golf course in Florida.
He steps into the office to pay the greenfee and says to the secretary, 'Miss, I just studied your club rules and couldn't help it to notice that your rule number one says, "five mulligans are mandatory on each hole." - Ah...??'
She shrugs, 'This is a Trump's course.'

 

[MG]

My ZFS upgrade was suspicious.

Enabled the following features on 'seagates':
  redaction_list_spill
  raidz_expansion
  fast_dedup
  longname
  large_microzap
  block_cloning_endian
  physical_rewrite

The ZFS system is on to something, it appears.

 

[blackbird9]

I always remembered this snippet from dilbert. It's so, so true

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dx6HojLBsnw

 

[Crivens]

They have dedicated cabins...
Heck, where have I been???

 

[Tomolok]

Joke:
KCalc
Konsole
Kate
KMail
KWallet
KFC
are all KDE applications

 

[doul]

Are all KDE applications

NO ! Joke: is not :-D

 

[Crivens]

We all know such places, don't we?
I just ordered some of the coffee mugs, leaving them in the office kitchen and waiting for feedback...

Edit: Missing (c): Shit & Sticks Solutions: (c) by Moris Snake

 

[blackbird9]

Oh, man... . Yeah..."if it works, it works", also known as "working as coded".

The typical sequence of events, goes something like this...
Stage 0: "I was on the phone to the head of department at 3 AM this morning, our biggest customer needs this bug fixed ASAP, and we need you to stop what you are doing right now and get on the job".
Stage 1: "we're not quite sure what it does, the guy who wrote it left 4 years ago, but it works, and whatever you do, don't change it while you fix the bug".
Stage 2: "no, we don't have a functional spec., and there's no unit test plan either".
Stage 3: "what do you mean 'Is there a regression test?' Not unless you're going to write one".
Stage 4: "will you have the fix ready by this evening? We need to know!"
Stage 5 (a few hours later): "ok, just check in what you've done so far, we're going to ship it!".

 

[blackbird9]

Joke:
KCalc
Konsole
Kate
KMail
KWallet
KFC
are all KDE applications

Come on, d00d... kde isn't that bad... I rather like plasma. Don't know about 'KFC' though!

 

[Crivens]

Stage 4: "just check in what you've done so far, we're going to ship it".

From the klingon rules of coding: "Maybe this is a good day to die, I say we ship it!"

 

[blackbird9]

From the klingon rules of coding: "Maybe this is a good day to die, I say we ship it!"

Actually I was going to add Stage 6, which is 'book a day's leave for the following day'...

 

[homeadm]

Shit & Sticks Solutions

"if it works, it works", also known as "working as coded".

I don't know why, but this specific combination of terms intrusively reminds me of Linux.

 

[blackbird9]

I don't know why, but this specific combination of terms intrusively reminds me of Linux.

Reminds me of windows

 

[Maturin]

We all know such places, don't we?

A place not being that way was nice for a change.


In January: "In September we are going into mass production. How much time do you need for that?"
"6 months."
"You have 4."
- any work on the project stays on hold until May -
In August: "How is your work coming along?"
"Well."
"When will you finish?"
"November."
"WHAT?! You've said, you'll be ready in June!"
"No. I said, I need six months. That had been August, if we started in February. June was your 4 months, if we started in February. But we started in May, and it simply needs six months. So it will be ready in November."
"That's too late!"
"That's not my fault."
"What kept you off starting in February when you knew it takes until August?"
"You. You said, all work on that project must wait and you had me to do a lot of other stuff first. And I told you several times, the schedule cannot be met this way."
"You are no teamplayer and you have a problem with hierarchy."
"I have no problem with hierarchy. I have a problem with superiors incapable of doing their job right."