I'm struggling with getting an overview of all the services installed, and what configuration I have to check.
install the freebsd-doc (english + your native language) and get through it. It's of the finest you can find among OS user/admin docs.
$ su -
# pkg search freebsd-doc
# pkg install {en,it}-freebsd-doc
You may want to transfer or download the PDF or HTML docs to your graphical desktop computer.
How do I identify all the rc.conf settings that pertain to a service?
Replace "ipfw" with the service name you get from service -l
$ service ipfw rcvar
Unfortunately, very few service scripts support this, so you have to read the service scripts. They are in
/etc/rc.d and
/usr/local/etc/rc.d. Luckily, the relevant settings are at the top of the scripts (mostly, not always). The default settings are in
/etc/defaults/rc.conf. Besides that, many services grab additional settings from their own configurations files, mostly found under
/etc and
/usr/local/etc
How do I make sure I didn't overlook an important rc.conf setting (or other setting)?
It's hard to give an honest answer... Be curious but patient and start to learn. It's worth it, be ashured you have solid system.
I do assume that FreeBSD is pretty secure by default.
Hmm. Yes and no...
At least go through
# bsdconfig
and set the single user console to ask for a password (that edits
/etc/ttys)
Last not least, you need to have a system
manufactured before 2008 
because todays consumer devices are like mainframe systems twenty years ago. If you want to be absolutely safe -- well, don't use any computer at all.