"Savaged by Systemd: an Erotic Unix Encounter" by Michael W. Lucas

Not sure about the symbolism though - I rather imagined the creature that is systemd as some sort of hydra with all her tentacles trying to insinuate themselves into any opening in any daemon she can get close to - I've come to FreeBSD as a GNU/Linux Debian user who has done his best to not let that monster get to be (PID) number 1 - it is possible, just, to keep her (or rather a few of those tentacles carefully severed from the main body and nailed to the ground) at bay on existing Debian systems but quite hard to avoid her embrace on a fresh (virgin ?) installation...

{Yeah I'm a die-hard sysV init user but lets not get too graphic here}