On tipping.

Alain De Vos

Alain De Vos

I don't tip, i never tip. Sometimes i offer the waitress a drink.
But here in Belgian we have serious minimum loans. Meaning enough to live with it. One job is enough.
Some cultures might have other customs, what is your take on this ?
 
The English have a different type of tipping custom... unfortunately:-/. It's called "fly tipping"..!

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When I was just getting into my teens, my dad taught me: "If you have just enough for a drink, but not for a tip, don't even bother going in".

I always tip. Sometimes over-tip. I'm not rich, on the contrary, I'm quite poor, but those folks don't live of their salary, they live of tips, and it's a way of showing them respect for their service to you.
 
If I am in countries that require tipping for the staff to make livable wages (USA, Canada, many "developing" countries etc.) I tip according to custom, unless I get charged a service fee anyhow. In countries without a tipping need/culture (such as Belgium) I do not.

Tipping is what enables you to possibly make rent if you make the federal minimum wage for "tipped employees", which is $2.13 per hour in the US (some states higher).
 
This is only US based for me: wife and I don't go out much so I tend to overtip. But I recognize the server has little input how well a meal is cooked. I've have excellent service, but crap food; specifically my food never came out, wife got hers, I said "where's mine", mine then came out cold and hamburger was still frozen. What do you do in that case? I explained to hostess, said I'll pay for my beers, pay for wifes food because she actually had something edible.
But what do you do for tipping? Who's fault? Cook, server?
In that specific case we got the whole meal comped (paid nothing) but I left a minimal tip (10%).

Most of the time we go to 2 or 3 places, family owned. We always get good food, good service so I overtip.
 
If I ever get unpleasant / rude server (very rare, I can remember only few occasions), I'll told them eye-to-eye (politely and in in low, quiet voice) that this is not appropriate behavior towards paying customer – I never snitched them to their bosses. They always got the message and correct their behavior immediately.

I'm calling for a manager only when I'm extra happy with a meal/service to compliment cook&server on it, and to remind them that tip I left is to be split among cook&server, and that they better not take cut of it.
 
I tip what is customary and not what social media will have you believe. I tip according to what the NY Times used to say though they have caved a bit in recent years.

Great service 20%. OK service gets 15%. I don't hate you but I want to send a message gets 10%. Anything less and I write in big letters "NO TIP" on the bill.

mer said:
Who's fault? Cook, server?
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Both. A good server at a good restaurant will never bring you bad food. A good server will check to make sure it is right before bringing it out.

Sometimes you can tell the server did their best and it was all they could do. I might give them a small tip (if I stay at all). At lower end restaurants they have no control whatsoever.

A couple of times I've walked out of restaurants mid-course. I absolutely refuse to wait to pay my bill. At one restaurant, the waitress brought my bill and I waited for her to come take my card. And I waited and I waited and I waited and I left.

Years ago, my son was a waiter. There was a guy who would come in, place his order, and then place stacks of quarters on the table. As his time went on, he would slide a quarter off the stacks depending on how good the service was.

This thing about over tipping because waiters need to make a living is BS. They know what they're getting into and know how it works. You only over tip to feel good about yourself.
 
Alain De Vos said:
Interesting, this different way of life.
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I must admit, my experience in eating/drinking in restaurants and bars is limited on few countries: my native Serbia, neighboring Bulgaria and Hungary, Botswana and South Africa. It didn't happen to me never ever anywhere that I was served a bad meal! On only few occasions meal happened to be in the "nothing special to write home about" category, but not bad, just average.

Funniest thing happened on my first night in Botswana (Nov. '99), I ordered "Four Seasons" (Quattro Stagioni) pizza, and what I got was pizza with a lot of shrooms on one half and almost nothing on the other. I burst in laughter – that's exactly how seasons work there – you have one season that is almost unbearable hot, and other that is not too hot, and if you are lucky there will be some rain for a few days. I understood it as cultural difference and left regular (10%) tip anyways.

Everywhere else I was served meals that I could write a poem about each one (If I had any talent for writing, which I don't).
 
I do see information on the Internet that tipping is just not a thing in Japan. When in US, however, it kind of depends on whether the dining experience merits a standard tip of 15% or even more. I generally tip if I don't experience a problem during my meal. If a waiter is pushy and disturbs my meal, or if I have to wait forever to get a waiter's attention for no obvious reason, then I reduce the standard 15% to maybe 10% or less depending on how bad it got. But if there's no problem, food is great, service is courteous and prompt, and my meal is not disturbed, then the tip from me can be much bigger. I once rounded a $37-something bill up to $50.00 because the meal was that satisfying and problem-free!
 
I cannot become comfort with the US way: Waitresses and bar counter personal are not payed, but work for tips, only. This way I get disenginuous friendliness if not submissiveness by sweated service, and way more "service" than I asked for, which means while sitting in an restaurant eating and adult's talk is being interrupted frequently by somebody annoyingly asking if something is needed while all glasses are still full, and everything had been okay if nobody had asked.
And I don't see why a waitress shall earn more money if she serves me a large steak with a glass of wine, and less for a simple soup and a glass of water while the service she does in both cases is the same.

Most of the times I just want ordinary, common service. Especially when I'm not in a noble restaurant but having just a cup of coffee I simply like to just enjoy my cup of coffee and what I read, neither need nor want some affected bumsucker buzz around me all the time.

In central western Europe tips are a kind of an appreciation, a bonus - if earned. All tagged prices include everything, also the wages for all staff. So if everything was okay, you got what you pay for, then there is no tip. And that is okay. No tip is expected at all.
Most of the times you just round up the check. But that's no real tip. That's just for to bill easier and quicker - even if this brings a few extra bucks into the waiter's purse.
Tip is for anything better than expected, above normal, for extras in service. Then its amount is somewhere between 0.5 to 2 € for small amounts, and 5 to 10€ for larger things, and sometimes 20€ or even more for really extraordinary things, especially in noble restaurants. Or if your wages are above average, and you're not an asshole, or experienced life at lower wages yourself, you give a 0.5...2€ minimum tip every time.
But in general tips are adjusted by feeling, not calculated on a fix percentage base by the bill.
So a waitress may get 30...200€ extra per shift to her wages - or not.

Nobody returns to a restaurant or a bar whith bad service or food. So we see no sense in subtreshold communication about bad service or bad food afterwards. For what? For "I gave it to them"? They will never see me again, so I don't care if they get it or not. Exit talks are pointless.
Btw. when you clearly ordered the check, and it won't come within 20 minutes, it's legal to leave the restaurant without paying. (Watch out! In some countries like e.g. Italy to pay at the table is uncommon, even if sometimes it's possible. In Italy you go to the register and pay there.)

Personally I like the way I know from Italy (there are other countries with this habit, too)
Many of the bars or restaurants have a tip jar beside the cash register. Not only guests may throw their tip into that - nobody takes a look, how much you throw into it, while banknotes stick out, of course - but also after every bill all extra amount above the check's amount is taken out from the register, and put into it - cash.
After the shift the boss distributes that money to all employees, excluding himself. This way all staff, also the guys in the kitchen get a tip. Because they all worked together as a team for the comfort of the guests.
 
igork said:
Are you saying that in the US waitresses are still relay on tips only? Interesting. I didn't know that.
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AFAIK they had a debate in the US about that to change many years ago. But AFAIK most wages - if they get any at all - are by far not remotely enough, so they still rely mostly on tips, yes.
 
In my opinion it makes sense in places where waitresses depend on tips solely. Same applies for other professionals.
However, I'm asking me a question, why this practice still exists... Why a cashier in supermarket, or, as fernandel said, a nursery gets a fixed salary. Wouldn't it be better (and for whom) to make them all tips dependent?
 
igork said:
Wouldn't it be better (and for whom) to make them all tips dependent?
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It's gotten ridiculous here in the US. You see tip jars and tip add ons for far too many things you wouldn't normally tip for. The most insulting and embarrassing one is when you buy something and they spin the touchpad around at you where you have to select a pre-determined tip amount or "no tip" right in front of the guy who served you. I always select "no tip" for the embarrassment they caused me.
 
drhowarddrfine said:
It's gotten ridiculous here in the US. You see tip jars and tip add ons for far too many things you wouldn't normally tip for. The most insulting and embarrassing one is when you buy something and they spin the touchpad around at you where you have to select a pre-determined tip amount or "no tip" right in front of the guy who served you. I always select "no tip" for the embarrassment they caused me.
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Wow! That's "amazing".
I've been to the US, in the Colorado state, somewhere around 2017. But I didn't know all these nuances. It's really interesting to know, even if I'm not there anymore.
I recall, being in a restaurant, waiter constantly watching my back. At that time I thought, "wow! what a great service". Now, I understand a little more :)
 
I have a problem with tips. I do not want to evaluate service just because I eat out. I do not want someone who is working to have to force themselves to be nice to me to earn more money. Would not it be fairer if tips were just included directly in the price of the meal? Not like tips, but going to a restaurant is a little more expensive and the employees charge a little more.
 
LoganGreystone said:
I do not want someone who is working to have to force themselves to be nice to me to earn more money.
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Well, this is true for any business.
LoganGreystone said:
Would not it be fairer if tips were just included directly in the price of the meal?
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No. A tip is an incentive to provide good service as well as a reward for doing so. Inserting it into the price of the meal would reward poor service, too, and is no longer a tip but the price of the meal.
 
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