When do you think x86 computers became "black boxes" that are no longer yours to work with and own? I would say it was when the Intel ME and AMD PSP were introduced. I think the state of modern consumer computing is terrifying. The ironic thing is that the IBM PC architecture succeeded because it was open.
I agree with your sentiment about modern consumer computing - closed off, non-reproducible wall garden systems for smart devices and such.
However I do not agree with examples given. Management Engine is simply server technology that got introduced in desktop space when every server on the planet earth came with baseboard management controller. People (like me) building servers out of desktop mainboards always wanted remote management capabilities. I remember getting first Q35 board and I was so excited I could power on my computer remotely and boot it with passwords - you know the same deal you would be doing if you deploy an encrypted server on someone's hosting - you would trust the SSL channel of the remote management console, as I trusted my VPN router channel, and then access the remote management under local network conditions.
Simply put ME is an iteration of WoL. And WoL is not going to help you if OS wont come up. Baseboard management takes care of this problem. Without it, server management as we know it would not exist.
What ME did that irked people out was just regular thing when being implemented on 'cheap' mainboards - using a sole NIC for Ethernet and management. On server-class boards the ME interface is separate.
However I have not seen proof of rogue behaviour by ME/AMT, DRAC, iLO, PSP on the network. Same with Huawei or Chinese devices. 10 years ago craze about them because they started to push Cisco out of the market (Cisco was always too exepensive anyway). Nobody put out proof that routers aren't just routing per rules but doing something rogue too.
Tangential, but a "NSA key" was found in Windows sources. Everyone immediately started saying NSA has access to your data and this is the encryption key they use. I won't even mention how finding a static value in the memory and getting a hardware trap every time the address is accessed is relatively easy with proper gear, hardcoding an encrpytion key in the sources is something a national security agency of medieval Kongo would know not to do.
WoL is possible because of ATX and power states. And here we get to the culprit - something that was annoying me decades ago, but I just learned to live with it - unless plugged out, the computer is on. There is no physical power switch for the mainboard any more - only in some cases on the PSU.
If the power isn't exactly power but just a state machine, an error, exploit in the platform could be used too.