It's all about jokes, funny pics...

[bsddaemon]

Do you think README dry and boring? You may think again :e


gnome-cups-manager
------------------

Once upon a time there was a printer who lived in the woods. He was a
lonely printer, because nobody knew how to configure him. He hoped
and hoped for someone to play with.

One day, the wind passed by the printer's cottage. "Whoosh," said the
wind. The printer became excited. Maybe the wind would be his
friend!

"Will you be my friend?" the printer asked.

"Whoosh," said the wind.

"What does that mean?" asked the printer.

"Whoosh," said the wind, and with that it was gone.

The printer was confused. He spent the rest of the day thinking and
jamming paper (for that is what little printers do when they are
confused).

The next day a storm came. The rain came pouring down, darkening the
morning sky and destroying the printer's garden. The little printer
was upset. "Why are you being so mean to me?" he asked.

"Pitter Patter, Pitter Patter," said the rain.

"Will you be my friend?" the printer asked shyly.

"Pitter Patter, Pitter Patter," said the rain, and then it left and
the sun came out.

The printer was sad. He spent the rest of the day inside, sobbing and
blinking lights cryptically (for that is what little printers do when
they are sad).

Then one day, a little girl stumbled into the printer's clearing in
the woods. The printer looked at this curious sight. He didn't know
what to think.

The little girl looked up at him. "Will you be my friend?" she asked.

"Yes," said the printer.

"What is your name?" asked the little girl.

"HP 4100TN", replied the printer.

"My name is gnome-cups-manager" said the little girl.

The printer was happy. He spent the rest of the day playing games and
printing documents, for that is what little printers do when they are
happy.


http://olympus.het.brown.edu/cgi-bin/dwww?type=file&location=/usr/share/doc/gnome-cups-manager/README

[snnn]

Who can give me some information about the Philip Hayden Foundation ?
I want to visit a orphan this weekend or next weekend

[bsddaemon]

Haha hilarious, Apple gears in Vista ads :D

http://hehe2.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/microsoft-using-apple-in-their-ads.jpg

[Weinter]

Microsoft wants to hint that the users got so fed up with OS X they installed Vista instead :e

[psycho]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/devotion_to_duty.png
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/pointers.png
hahaha these xkcd are crazy!

[DutchDaemon]

Any sysadmin worried about uptime is not worth his pay.

[fronclynne]

Grandpa is in the hospital and Grandma and Granddaughter go to pay him a visit.

Granddaughter excitedly runs ahead, into the room, and jumps up on the hospital bed.

"Grandpa!" she says, and then comes closer to whisper conspiratorially to him, "can you make a frog call when Grandma gets here?"

He smiles, "I guess. Why, though?"

"Cos Grandma says that when you croak we're going to Disneyland!"

[sossego]

I have a strange sense of humor.

At the store when the total comes up, I'll give an answer such as,"I'm out of cash, can I pay you in crack?"

One I made up- (If this is offensive to anyone, then I ask the moderators to remove it)
How do cannibals stay so thin?
They only eat crackers.

[Ruler2112]

If big chested women work at Hooters, where do women with only one leg work?










Ihop. :)

[Nirbo]

Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?

If it had four it'd be a chicken sedan

Gets me every time. Coupe :D

[graudeejs]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/devotion_to_duty.png
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/pointers.png
hahaha these xkcd are crazy!

Now that was funny

[graudeejs]

Here's one of my favourite Google translations from English to Latvian I wan printed in university:

English original:
I am hard rock fan
Translation to Latvian
Es esmu cieto iežu ventilators

Now I'll translate this to approximately appropriate English (in terms of meaning)
I am hard stone ventilator

It should have been
Es esmu smagā roka fans
or
Es esmu smagā roka cienītājs

[psycho]

http://i44.tinypic.com/5xw82.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://c4.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/5/l_62c05306de31f52952b016c72b796363.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://i.piccy.kiev.ua/i/e2/0d/341e8afcabc0bfd4578f6221608e.jpeg

http://abstrusegoose.com/strips/ars_longa_vita_brevis.PNG

http://i48.tinypic.com/2efq4r9.gif

http://forumlocal.ru/user/upload/file329381.jpg

you still look toward Europe? then we go to you =)
http://i.ganjafoto.ru/1/35/69/1356910.jpg

politically incorrect!
9mm Glock. seem - 19 model. The height of this model - 127 mm
the image can be seen that the height of the pistol bullets height of 2.5 in the "belt"
bullet and a gun at the same distance from the viewer
this is based on the height of the bullet ~ 50mm, ie a NATO 7.62 bullets, but not 5.56
If you look closely, the height of the bullet + cervical sleeves in the amount of> 1 / 3 the height cartridge
at 5.56 height of this space is <1 / 3 the height of the cartridge. it is also a hint that the bullets - 7.62

http://www.x0.org.ua/images/34/thumbnail/265.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/34/265)

http://www.sexylette.com/hosted-gals/0034/images/3.jpg

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/7321/1257438833050.jpg

[psycho]

http://forum.jezgra.org/files/11863_181470012892_502012892_3087104_3343257_n.jpg
================================================== =============================

http://forum.jezgra.org/files/16748_169437322202_657882202_3370741_1679098_n.jpg
================================================== =============================

http://forum.jezgra.org/files/22665_1325065333557_1438609934_921640_6189921_n.jp g

[ProFTP]

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/3351/ohnoes1.jpg

[User23]

Microsoft Office: Dont touch it ^^

http://www.eblogx.com/Videos--Microsoft-Office-Ultimate-mit-Alarmanlage-16051.html

[ProFTP]

http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/

http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/1a/316.jpg
http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/1a/292.png

[expl]

http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/
...

Damn, you just helped me to find my gimped wallpapers from the old days :D
And there I thought I lost them for ever after hardrive fail. Miss the 1280x1024 days.

http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/1a/97.png
http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/1a/171.jpg
http://www.unixnsk.ru/pic/1a/134.jpg

[sossego]

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/bos/533096562.html


The man must have some hairy palms.
Old and funny.

[roddierod]

From the freebsd-question mailing list


I work for a young company who developed a fast download platform for huge files (we mix central servers and pear to pear).


http://marc.info/?l=freebsd-questions&m=127367155418964&w=2

[Beastie]

Pear-to-pear networks are so tasty. You should all try them more often.

Star topology pear-to-pear network example: http://www.gardenaction.co.uk/images/pear_conference.jpg

[psycho]

one happy winbl0ws user

http://i46.tinypic.com/2vwxp5c.jpg

[fronclynne]

For some reason regex is giving me the giggles: The back-reference code is subtle and doubts linger about its correctness
in complex cases.
. . .
There are suspected problems with response to obscure error conditions.
Notably, certain kinds of internal overflow, produced only by truly enor-
mous REs or by multiply nested bounded repetitions, are probably not han-
dled well.

Due to a mistake in IEEE Std 1003.2 (``POSIX.2''), things like `a)b' are
legal REs because `)' is a special character only in the presence of a
previous unmatched `('. This cannot be fixed until the spec is fixed.

The standard's definition of back references is vague. For example, does
`a\(\(b\)*\2\)*d' match `abbbd'? Until the standard is clarified, behav-
ior in such cases should not be relied on.

[Ruler2112]

one happy winbl0ws user

Is it just me or does that look like Jean-Claude VanDamme?

[psycho]

indeed!
i think it is him

[expl]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3387/3630361613_a4f4938c78_o.gif


http://www.codesimian.com/openSourceCommunism.jpg


http://angryweb.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/linux_body_painting_kl.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://photofile.ru/photo/gnix/135043996/large/135695081.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/3786/lotrgifjpg.gif

http://sexylette.com/hosted-gals/images/0002/001_lg.jpg

http://ipicture.ru/upload/100518/E6CL6th6vn.gif

http://s43.radikal.ru/i102/1005/f4/cafbe3d7e422.jpg

http://exler.ru/blog/upload/Image/image001.gif

[ProFTP]

http://blogs.pcworld.co.nz/pcworld/tux-love/vista_source.gif

http://dl.ziza.ru/other/052010/24/pics/Photopodborka_053.jpg

[graudeejs]

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apple << What it's like to own an Apple product

[sossego]

http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/2841/36585515ea5.png

http://globalnerdy.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/mac_unix_vista.jpg

http://sandcat.nl/~hugo/fun/20050427-unix.jpg

[sossego]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/ashen1/ashen/menu/build/intro.htm

[sossego]

http://tinyurl.com/63byd

Sometimes censorship is a bad thing.

[nestux]

Haha OMG.

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l4w05fmwKw1qzpwi0o1_500.jpg

[johnblue]

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1886349

[ProFTP]

http://i.piccy.info/i3/ac/d1/9b7c5f4083ef45ca15bb1e3c7cb1.jpeg

[SirDice]

An IT student is walking along with his bike when another IT student walks up to him and goes “Nice bike. Where did you get it?”

The first student says, “The other day, this beautiful woman ran up to me with this bike, threw it on the ground, ripped off all her clothes and said ‘Take anything you want!’”

The first student says, “So I took the bike”.

The second student says, “Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn’t have fit”.

[fronclynne]

Why do programmers always confuse Halloween and Christmas?

Because 31(oct) = 25(dec)

[Business_Woman]

Enjoy.
http://ww.wimp.com/happiestdj/

[sk8harddiefast]

xaxaxxaxxaaa :)

[sk8harddiefast]

Look the second man! :P
You will laugh to death!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHpw6CzprNY

[DutchDaemon]

Please don't open new topics for videos, pics, etc. This one is fine.

[anomie]

Look the second man! :P
You will laugh to death!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHpw6CzprNY

Oddly, I already saw this clip months ago. My favorite insight from the always cerebral viewer commentary: "Eli is one of the illest Mc ever".

[chancey]

Haha I love this thread! Too many funny posts to quote on.

[mike_s]

Two guys are talking to each other. The first guy: "I am going to a Unix convention tomorrow." Second guy replies: "I did not know there were so many eunuchs."

[graudeejs]

When you delete file under Windows
Are you sure you want to delete .... files
You press Yes
Why?

[sk8harddiefast]

You press Yes
Why?
Because if you press No they will not be deleted :P

[ProFTP]

New version of FreeBSD, a new logo


http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/532.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/532)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/533.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/533)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/534.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/534)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/535.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/535)

http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/536.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/536)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/537.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/537)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/538.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/538)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/539.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/539)

[ProFTP]

http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/540.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/540)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/541.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/541)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/542.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/542)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/543.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/543)

http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/544.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/544)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/545.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/545)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/546.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/546)http://www.x0.org.ua/images/45/thumbnail/547.jpg (http://www.x0.org.ua/photo/view/45/547)

[OldFriend]

Just a funny guy dancing in Armazao de Pera's beach, Portugal, after smoking weed.
Have fun!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7Xx8C7oVhg

PS: Watch out for the erection!

[ProFTP]

http://i.imgur.com/273s6.jpg

http://ipicture.ru/uploads/100710/dfgh7ISs4R.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://www.yaplakal.com/uploads/post-3-12826407337424.gif

[kdemidofff]

http://www.bytelove.com/stuff/gadgets/cat_14.html

[Caliante]

WOMEN WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE

Barbara Walters, of 20/20, did a story on gender roles in Kabul,
Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict.

She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.

She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind
their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to, and are happy to, maintain the old custom.

Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?'

The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said:

'Land Mines.'

[Caliante]

Murphy applied for a fork lift operator job at a famous Irish firm based in Dublin. A Pole applied for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications, they were asked to take a test and led to a quiet room with no interruptions by the Manager.

When the results were in, both men had scored 19 out of 20.

The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for coming to the interview, but we’ve decided to give the Pole the job."

Murphy, "And why would you be doing that? We both got 19 questions roite. This being Ireland and me being Irish surely I should get the job."

Manager, " We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you got wrong."

Murphy, " Tell me now, and how would one incorrect answer be better than another?"

Manager, " Simple. On question number 7 the Pole wrote down, 'I don’t know.' You put down, ‘Neither do I’.

[sossego]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_khimR3zT86w/SLT08-j0vpI/AAAAAAAAANI/yrMgPffDs1o/S1600-R/Linux_drugs.jpg

This explains it all.

[ProFTP]

http://pub.genx.ru/imgs/mdv_nvd.gif

http://www.mapkc.org/uploads_user/1000/1/2432.jpg

http://www.mapkc.org/uploads_user/1000/1/109.jpg

http://www.ljplus.ru/img4/v/i/vilius1968/6170_5805.gif

[User23]

Very funny to see a bear looking like a penguin! nothing against russia!

Edit: damn external links are not allowed

http://www.bildschirmarbeiter.com/pic/bildschirmarbeiter_-_picdump_17.09.2010/#picdump-10-09-17-084-jpg

[fronclynne]

http://www.asciiartfarts.com/20100901.html

[Beastie]

http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000443.gif
http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000444.gif
http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000446.gif
http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000447.gif
http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000448.gif
http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/99mar/uf000449.gif

[johnblue]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/surgery.png

[johnblue]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/open_source.png

[DutchDaemon]

http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/129074836664980469.jpg

[Crivens]

Explain the Internet (http://www.fastcompany.com/1697711/explain-the-internet-19th-century-british-street-urchin-doogie-horner#self)

[bleakwind]

Here's one of my favourite Google translations from English to Latvian I wan printed in university:

English original:

Translation to Latvian


Now I'll translate this to approximately appropriate English (in terms of meaning)


It should have been

or


This is a restaurant.

[bleakwind]

http://forums.freebsd.org/attachment.php?attachmentid=1031&d=1288430584

[ProFTP]

http://www.yaplakal.com/uploads/post-3-12893089723035.jpg
http://www.coolspot.org.uk/images/pussyCAT.jpg

[Beastie]

This is probably very stupid, but every time I play these <movie name> in 5 seconds videos, I can't stop laughing.

Batman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDkwB4ipei8)
Terminator 3 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=biGJFBplD_4)
The Matrix (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQ5iFQv1KaE)
The Running Man (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f26jirJEles)
Total Recall (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUGkUQkw_0o)

[nekoexmachina]

http://hipsterhitler.com/2010/08/juice/
Thats. Just. Awesome.

[graudeejs]

This made me laugh real loud:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpRqvCps_MQ

[nestux]

http://9gag.com/photo/52968_460.jpg

[UNIXgod]

http://www.unixprogram.com/images/box.jpg

[PseudoCylon]

There are hardware troubles (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/11/26/ventblockers_2/) FreeBSD cannot fix.

[sk8harddiefast]

There are hardware troubles FreeBSD cannot fix.
Wtf???? Oh! A dead frog!!!!

[Alt]

"Great Knot" is really great too xD

[nekoexmachina]

There are hardware troubles FreeBSD cannot fix.
somehow it felt like something scratching my soul with long and sharp nails.

[graudeejs]

Funny video about our history
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcKIeD3RxRQ&feature=related

EDIT:
Dave Chappelle - The Niggar Family:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtqqMchhUkw
Tupac - I Wrote This Song In '94 w/ Video (Dave Chappelle):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4eLABXmjySE
Dave Chappelle - Ghetto:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daQ-sTGp6bM&feature=related

[FRANCOIS]

http://www.bangbug.org/:e

[graudeejs]

Yesterday I got this on youtube
http://www.failiem.lv/thumb.php?i=sqbqeu&n=youtube.jpg (http://www.failiem.lv/thumb_show.php?i=sqbqeu&n=youtube.jpg)

[Daisuke_Aramaki]

Now that's a very family friendly clinic.

http://ompldr.org/vNmx1OA

[dclau]

http://www.io.com/~dierdorf/vi-emacs2.jpg

http://www.io.com/~dierdorf/emacsvi.html

[phil10]

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

[graudeejs]

While I was studding "System Analysis and blablabla-whaterer"
I decided to search for some diagram cheatsheats and came up with this
http://tnerual.eriogerg.free.fr/0xBABAF000L/0019_en_analysis-paralysis.png

[FRANCOIS]

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/BSD_is_Dying

[expl]

Inception movie explained programmatically (https://github.com/karthick18/inception)

[FRANCOIS]

A grade school teacher was asking his pupils what their parents did for a living.
"Tim, you be first. What does your mother do all day?"
Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor."
"That's wonderful. How about you, Amy?"
Amy shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."
"Thank you, Amy" said the teacher. "What does your parent do, Billy?"
Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy plays piano in a wh*rehouse."

The teacher was aghast and went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy's father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation. Billy's dad said, "I'm actually a system programmer specializing in TCP/IP communication protocol on UNIX systems. How can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"

[DutchDaemon]

Ha, that is actually a Mark Twain joke about atheism in America, or was it Harry Truman about being a politician?

[FRANCOIS]

I really wouldn't know about that !:e
I sort of bumped into it, found it kind of funny and thought why not post it.
Mark TWAIN certainly wrote about a lot of things some I would not post in here( highly offensive);)

[Alt]

Actually in this joke Billy's father not playing piano, it was something like "F**** with packets", in same place of course xD This gives better picture of internet

[DutchDaemon]

I wouldn't know what is offensive about Mark Twain, really .. great humorist.

[Zare]

He used the word "niggers" or "negros" to describe Afroamericans in his writings. Here (http://www.twainquotes.com/Negroes.html) you can read some of his quotes on the subject, and it's pretty clear that he has no racial prejudice. But it seems to me that those were the main terms back in the day, and weren't used as insults in general rule.

I'm no expert on semantics or how those words came to be, when they become insults and all of it. Just trying to say that Mark Twain didn't use them as insults.

[Beastie]

The Tom Sawyer novels are filled with "nigger"/"negro", but everyone used to talk like that back then. I've seen worse.

Overall, he was great, I agree.

[DutchDaemon]

That whole Mark Twain "nigger controversy" is the biggest pile of nonsense I've ever seen. What an unnecessary and ill-informed attack on a great writer, punishing a legacy over contemporary parlance.

[FRANCOIS]

@DutchDaemon

oh, but the dude was also a notorious antisemite!:P
Despite that it's true he was genius writer.
But so were voltaire, céline also great writer and the list goes on and on.
We got to admit we live in all together different century, things that were ok back then are nowadays "politically incorrect".

[DutchDaemon]

Who cares? Literature (every cultural expression for that matter) should be judged in its time and place. For the record: I've heard plenty of African-Americans state that they think replacing 'nigger/negro' with 'slave' makes it even worse .. PC do-gooders ..

[vdvluc]

http://s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/53663/1296914644/Image5.jpg

[JuniperSprouts]

http://i35.tinypic.com/10d9p43.jpg
My mates are all obsessed with this one currently.

[ProFTP]

http://i.imgur.com/hBriM.gif

[sossego]

http://mostly-harmful.net/page/36.2008

[sk8harddiefast]

Hi-tech emo (http://mostly-harmful.net/data/038-hitechemo.jpg) :P

[FRANCOIS]

Bill Gates meets Hugh Grant at a Hollywood party. They are talking and Bill says, "I've seen some great pictures of Devine Brown lately, sure would like to get together with her!"

Hugh replies, "Well Bill, you know ever since our incident, her price has skyrocketed, she's charging a small fortune."

Bill replies with a chuckle, "Hugh, money's no object to me. What's her number?"

So, Hugh gives Bill her number and Bill sets up a date.

They meet and after they finish, Bill is lying there in ecstasy, mumbling, "God... now I know why you chose the name Devine."

To which she replies, "Thank you Bill.....and now I know how you chose the name Microsoft!"

[bes]

Amount of profanity in git commit messages per programming language. (http://andrewvos.com/2011/02/21/amount-of-profanity-in-git-commit-messages-per-programming-language/)

Out of 929857 commit messages:
http://www.andrewvos.com/images/2011/02/profanity-bar-chart.png
http://www.andrewvos.com/images/2011/02/profanity-by-word.png
http://www.andrewvos.com/images/2011/02/other-words.png
http://www.andrewvos.com/images/2011/02/profanity.png

Freebsd-Head:
cd /usr/src/
egrep -R "*beep**beep**beep**beep*| shit | ass " --color ./:)
Show what we can see. (https://privatepaste.com/c19eca9735)
(This paste will expire in 29 days.)

[tingo]

You should take the data files for fortune out of the equation first.

[vermaden]

As I am from Poland, let me introduce to You some of 'our' beatiful Polish language:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=YueWiSAOVns

[kisscool-fr]

A polski jest jezykiem ktory jest po prostu stworzony do przeklinania

bardzo smieszne :e

pierdolić (to *beep**beep**beep**beep* someone/to tell bloody bollocks), przy-pierdolić (hit someone or something), prze-pierdolić (to lose sth (eg. all money)), za-pierdolić (to kill), do-pierdolić (to overdo), na-pierdolić (many meanings), u-pierdolić (to cut down sth), wy-pierdolić (throw out sth), w-pierdolić (to beat someone), s-pierdolić (do sth wrong), po-pierdolić (said about someone nuts), pod-pierdolić (to steal). Also when conjugated, these words may mean different things than stated here.

Just one great comment for those who understand it :)

[vermaden]

Have another one then ;)
http://img313.imageshack.us/img313/1183/polish2mv.jpg

[ProFTP]

http://pics.livejournal.com/balticcat/pic/0000sf2x

[kpedersen]

http://img402.imageshack.us/img402/8599/woman10.th.png (http://img402.imageshack.us/i/woman10.png/)

I recently have bought an old Thinkpad 756D to use as a wireless access point and I noticed in the Windows 95 background selector "Woman10".

It is like a desperate cry from a 10 year old IBM saying "Women use computers too! Honest!".

I chuckled :)

[kpedersen]

http://www.scientificlinux.org/documentation/graphics/logo.contest/Logo%20Contest/view

Is it just me or do scientists not have much of an imagination?

6 out of the 7 entries are... a tad similar lol

[UNIXgod]

So funny! for you db guys:

http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/6995033/

backup:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2F-DItXtZs

[PseudoCylon]

The inovation of the 21st century
http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

http://mail.google.com/mail/help/images/motion/motion_printable_guide.pdf
My favourite action from the above list is "star message"

Think a moment, some of us is using this technology to post a thread...
That's funny.

[Zare]

Think about today's date.

[da1]

Pay attention to the video (scooter - friends turbo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRqAOyXL15Q)) from 00:55 onwards.

Hahahah .. it's incredibly hilarious :)))).

[sk8harddiefast]

Scooter are the best!!l :) I like this song so much: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOFc3PAQ8DQ

[carlton_draught]

So funny! for you db guys:

http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/6995033/


That is funniest thing I have seen in at least a month, maybe several. If /dev/null is fast and web-scale I will use it! :e

[bes]

https://github.com/MrMEEE/bumblebee/commit/a047be85247755cdbe0acce6f1dafc8beb84f2ac

[graudeejs]

https://github.com/MrMEEE/bumblebee/commit/a047be85247755cdbe0acce6f1dafc8beb84f2ac

Epic

[SirDice]

This is incredibly old and I'm actually surprised it still works.
I'm sure you newbies haven't seen this one yet :e

telnet towel.blinkenlights.nl

[fonz]

telnet towel.blinkenlights.nl
Whoa, it's still alive! Cool. :e

Fonz

[sossego]

blah

[FRANCOIS]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXlBVNddjpA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0fAQkaiu84

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbNVY4OPEdE

[Kiiski]

One of great Fingerpori comics by Pertti Jarla:

1323

Text in english:

Somewhere in the middle east:

They got me...

72 virgins are waiting for you in heaven!

[Crest]

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

It happens. Get over it.

[bes]

pjd@ :
Hi.

I gave a talk about ZFS during EuroBSDCon 2007, and because it won the
the best talk award and some find it funny, here it is:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=o3TGM0T1CvE

a bit better version is here:

http://people.freebsd.org/~pjd/misc/zfs/zfs-man.swf
...
--
Pawel Jakub Dawidekhttp://lists.freebsd.org/pipermail/freebsd-fs/2007-September/003806.html

[graudeejs]

Got funny spam email from an ideot:
From: Nadyasha Carey <mohamedbongee@yahoo.com>
Subject: I hope you will like my smile


Hello!!! I Nadya. I like cooking, walking. I single and i search gentleman for create a family. I attach my photo. If it is interesting to you answer on my e-mail: SOME FAKED EMAIL Your Nadya.

This one I got today, from (probably) Mohamed Bongee. lol. What a looser

[vermaden]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/fixed_width.png

[Carpetsmoker]

I wrote a "service" command today, only to learn someone already did that. do'h!

[Sebulon]

These always crack me up. Just thinking about them makes me smiley inside:)

http://media.photobucket.com/image/double+face+palm+/KevlarPaperclip/double-facepalm.jpg

http://bash.org/?88575

http://bash.org/?926695

/Sebulon

[graudeejs]

These always crack me up. Just thinking about them makes me smiley inside:)

http://media.photobucket.com/image/double+face+palm+/KevlarPaperclip/double-facepalm.jpg

http://bash.org/?88575

http://bash.org/?926695

/Sebulon

http://bash.org/?212775
lol

[kdemidofff]

板野友美 EMOBILE CM 小悪魔篇 30sec
http://youtu.be/TS3QKkmb4Vk

[Carpetsmoker]

Am I the only one who thought that's a spambot? :)

[graudeejs]

I thought same

[lme@]

Am I the only one who thought that's a spambot? :)

I almost banned him. :)

[DutchDaemon]

You trigger-happy people ... sigh.

[aragon]

I just wished her daemonware were in red... and the ad were in English. :P

[kdemidofff]

What if Operating Systems were Airlines?


This old standby is here updated for 2012...
Air DOS
Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides; then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. They then push again, jump on again, and so on...
Mac Airlines
All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just shut up.

Windows Air
The airport terminal is pretty and colourful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the air the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Fly NT (pre-release)
The passengers march out onto the runway, say the password in unison, and form the outline of an airplane. Then they all sit down and make a whooshing sound just like they were really flying.

NT Air (post-release)
Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

UNIX Airways
Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building.

Linux Air
Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on time without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"

Air Taligent
You apply for a ticket 24 to 36 months in advance, paying a large application fee. Then you are alerted that "exclusive" ticket slots will be available, but on a first-come-first-served basis. There is no scheduled departure time for any flight, but the "exclusive" ticket will ensure you get your seat on the first flight.. whenever that is. After purchasing this "exclusive" ticket upgrade, at an exorbitant price, you never hear from Air Taligent again. After 8 months you call the airline and ask them about the status of your flight. They politely inform you of a "slight slip" in the take-off schedule and advise you to call again in about 6 months. At this point you are somewhat irate and the Taligent ticket agent offers you this consolation: you're entitled to a privileged "simulation" of what the flight would be like once they do build the plane -- just stop by any time.

Newton Airways
After buying your ticket 18 months in advance, you finally get to board the aircraft. Upon boarding you are asked your name. After 46 repetitions, the crew member recognizes your name and you are permitted to take a seat. Just as you are sitting down, the steward announces that you will have to repeat the boarding process because they are out of room and need to re-count to see how many more passengers they can admit.

Palm Air
You are astonished at the number of passengers who can sit comfortably in the tiny and elegant airframe. You are also astonished, though less pleasantly, when your itinerary reveals 14 stopovers on your way across country . . . for refueling.

keywords: plastic bags, windowse, linuxe, cannabis

[anomie]

It's hard to not love this thread.

[freethread]

The kdemidofff post recall me something similar (I souldn't post things like this)
car balk (http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/autos.asp)

[Carpetsmoker]

GNU Hurd airways
The plane is still in construction and awaiting takeoff.


Android airways
The plane flies very beautifully and extremely fast. That is, after you've reflashed the autopilot with CyogenPilot, installed & configured a bunch of new stewardesses, and run "Stewardess killer" every once in a while. Too bad the plane has to land once a hour to refuel.


Oracle Airways
This information is proprietary knowledge. Please contact an Oracle ales representative.


CentOS airways
Great robust plane. Too bad it's 60 years old and flies at the speed of an unladen African swallow.

[fonz]

Please contact an Oracle ales representative.
I've never had an Oracle ale, are they any good?

Fonz

[kpedersen]

Cygwin Airways
You sit back and relax in the familiar and comfortable aeroplane and enjoy the flight. However you wake up to realize that you havn't actually gone anywhere. You then take a look around and realize you are not in an aeroplane at all, but instead sitting on a park bench with a hangover...

[Slurp]

I've never had an Oracle ale, are they any good?

Fonz

This information is proprietary knowledge. Please contact an Oracle ales representative.

[fonz]

This information is proprietary knowledge. Please contact an Oracle ales representative.
With plenty of good ales out there, I don't think it's particularly wise for Oracle to make it so difficult for prospective customers to sample their beers :e

Fonz

[ChalkBored]

I smell another Oracle lawsuit coming.
http://www.pcworld.com/article/240952/google_tries_its_hand_at_beer.html

[draco003]

the invisible passwd: ***** http://bash.org/?244321

so there i was in this hallway right... http://bash.org/?99060

caps lock http://bash.org/?835030

[FRANCOIS]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Re2Oh4rxN6w

[Crivens]

GNU Hurd airways
The plane is still in construction and awaiting takeoff.

... and when the plane is ready to take off, you find that aeroplanes are a thing of the past and there exists no airport to land the thing on. You turn back and find the runway you started from being turned into a giant ad-board to be seen from orbit. Cou can not land because the paint is still wet. The HOWTO tells you this will be addressed in the next release.

iOS Airlines:
All is shiny and looks really hip, you find that you are glued into your seat and can not bring any magazine or book which the plane manufacturer does not approve of. You can not really talk the the next guy. You sometimes hear a sniffing sound from where your personal data is stored, but that is OK. At least everybody tells you so.

[draco003]

String Theory lol xD (http://xkcd.com/171/)

eternal_flame (http://xkcd.com/961/)

stephen_hawking (http://xkcd.com/799/)

[Carpetsmoker]

Just when you think you've seen it all ...

DOS on DOPE is the modern MVC framework built on the awesome power of batch files. (http://dod.codeplex.com/)

[Slurp]

Just when you think you've seen it all ...

DOS on DOPE is the modern MVC framework built on the awesome power of batch files. (http://dod.codeplex.com/)

Oh my....


It's one of the most impressive pointless exercises I've seen in a while.

[frijsdijk]

Any sysadmin worried about uptime is not worth his pay.

So right!

[sk8harddiefast]

Unbelievable! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vo0Cazxj_yc)

[aragon]

Unbelievable! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vo0Cazxj_yc)
This one too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp-OtbZEuEc

[sk8harddiefast]

Is riding everywhere!!!! I like Danny Macaskill a lot :) This is his best video I guess (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj6ho1-G6tw) :)

[Crivens]

Oh yeah : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXW0bx_Ooq4

[FRANCOIS]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHosLhPEN3k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1S1fISh-pag

Write in C
~~~~~~~~~~
When I find my code in tons of trouble,
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom:
"Write in C"

As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers:
"Write in C"

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, oh, Write in C
LOGO's dead and buried,
Write in C

I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
For science it worked flawlessly
Try using it for graphics!
Write in C

If you've just spent nearly 30 hours
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to
Write in C

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C
Only wimps use BASIC
Write in C

Write in C, Write in C
Write in C, oh, Write in C
Pascal won't quite cut it

Write in C

Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C
Don't even mention COBOL
Write in C

[roddierod]

Truly one of the funnier youtube videos...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXmv8quf_xM&feature=related

[Beastie]

Video game "Mongols" LOL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFUx8-3Y-oc

[LateNiteTV]

Truly one of the funnier youtube videos...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXmv8quf_xM&feature=related

Jesus Christ. "tracer tee". Thanks for making my day lololol.

[DutchDaemon]

I punched the screen the moment he started typing tracert http:// .... And Windows executes it too! And then one of the biggest delusions I've ever heard ensued. This cannot be serious

[bbzz]

I punched the screen the moment he started typing tracert http:// .... And Windows executes it too! And then one of the biggest delusions I've ever heard ensued. This cannot be serious

Wait...wait.

I refuse to believe he can be... The kid's must be trolling....right? Please say yes.

[freethread]

I punched the screen the moment he started typing tracert http:// .... And Windows executes it too!...

lol you're right, it executes it, foolproof

update:

and also this, but the result is the same
tracert ftp://google.com
tracert abc://google.com

[roddierod]

Wait...wait.

I refuse to believe he can be... The kid's must be trolling....right? Please say yes.

I don't know...I watched a couple more of his videos and they are all like this. Either this kid is some comic genius because he so deadpan or he is one of the worst "hackers" ever.

[LateNiteTV]

I'm pretty sure he's serious. He may have spent some time on Ubuntuforums to learn those sweet computer hacking skills.

[FRANCOIS]

I'm pretty sure he's serious. He may have spent some time on Ubuntuforums to learn those sweet computer hacking skills.

you are being mean to that poor kid(It could be a girl tho, the voice is rather ambiguous):e
@SOSSEGO :
You're welcome.

[Crivens]

Who would like to try this (https://plus.google.com/u/0/102518365620075109973/posts/DqDoSujhcjL#102518365620075109973/posts/DqDoSujhcjL) also?

Damn, this looks impressive.

[vermaden]

http://i.imgur.com/pAy4z.png

[bbzz]

Holy crap! But, it must be a joke...

[bbzz]

This is same guy, what a scholar

http://i.imgur.com/eZNjX.jpg

[j4r3ck]

http://kotburger.pl//uimages/services/kotburger/i18n/pl_PL//201102/1298558224_by_matex1999_500.jpg?1317043591

"The Pianist"

[jrm]

Truly one of the funnier youtube videos...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXmv8quf_xM&feature=related

I fear for the future of our species.

[graudeejs]

I fear for the future of our species.

That comment made my day

[Sebulon]

Gandalf performs the intro to "Fresh Prince in Bel Air"
http://www.dump.com/2011/09/17/ian-mckellen-impression-fresh-prince-of-bel-air-remix-with-music-video/

/Sebulon

[bluetick]

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. 'What the heck is this?' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.

'Bev', he hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?'

She replied with a snicker. 'It's not talcum powder; it's 'Miracle Grow'!!!!!